>Rhianna took Chris Brown back? Whack.

March 4, 2009 § 6 Comments

>Entry for many ultras and ironmans are filling up in days, even minutes. It seems like every kid on the block (even the new ones….haha) are getting into endurance sports and consider themselves awesome because of it. I don’t agree with this. Although one of the many TWSS mottos is DBAP, let’s be honest – some people in this world HAVE to be a pussy for the sake of maintaining the proper hierarchy of the athletic world. I firmly stand by that. I don’t really know how to handle the fact that my sports are becoming trendy. So what did I do? I decided I needed to find a new sweet sport to do that no one else does. I googled “most extreme sports ever” and found this website. As I looked through these 11 sports, I decided that they would not only be more fun with at least one other person, but for safety’s sake I’d need to have a friend to partake in them with me. So, here’s my pick of extreme sports teammates. The number of your name (if you’re so lucky to be chosen) corresponds with that number sport from the article.

1. Brennan is the obvious choice for this. He’s fast, efficient, a mid-westerner, and most definitely irons a mean dress shirt.
2. Claire. I’m pretty sure you could stand up in one of those little balls, so that’s gotta be an advantage.
3. Melissa. When I saw the outfits those people had on in the pics, you just popped into my mind wearing the same thing.
4. Fun Jen Koshy. Skinny and agile, but fast and fierce. What a combination.
5. Kris. Even though there are certain elements of your genetic makeup that make me doubt your swimming abilities, I have faith that you could construct us some sort of fishing pole that gives us an obvious advantage. And we’ll just wear life jackets.
6. Ben. Bull riding has obvious advantages for The Ass Man.
7. Arjun. I’d make sure you did the calculations beforehand to make sure I don’t die.
8. Kip. You’re pretty lightweight so I think that this may actually work when you do it.
9. Emily. Your Marine Biology experience would be a huge asset when I come face to face with a giant shark.
10. Ryan. Mostly because we watched that ep of AR where the teams had to get the cheese down the big hill, and after discussing strategies with you I trust your ability to win this.
11. Carson. I feel like anyone who does this sport is bound to get seriously hurt….I’ll tell her to go first.

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§ 6 Responses to >Rhianna took Chris Brown back? Whack.

  • THE KRIS says:

    >too offended to reply. ok, i’ll work up some plans for a fishing-pole-floatation-device. still offended.

  • Jen says:

    >First the rumor at my school is that Rihanna took him back bc she’s preggers. Even more of a reason why I’d dump his sorry ass. Second, when I demand things you deliver quite well. I support being in the mix of 300 hot British accents.

  • EL says:

    >I have actually done some free diving, but always accompanied by a spear gun, mmmm, sushi.

  • RM says:

    >Ha, that was pretty funny. Esp the last one.Free diving is CRAZY dangerous. Sports Illustrated did an article one time on this lady who was insane at it, and she was married to this guy who also did it – but one day he kind of pushed her too far and she died.Oh and as far as Rhianna and Chris Brown – you don’t know the whole story! They both called me that week, upset, wondering what to do. I said find some new hobbies in the meantime and it’ll all work out. R said C didn’t really hit her, her makeup was just all wack that day.

  • Claire says:

    >Nice post. Zorbing could be fun but it is a lot like a Gerbil Ball and I remember the hell I put my gerbils thru in that thing and I’m not sure I would come out in one piece like they did. Kite jumping can hurt. I was kite skiing on a frozen lake and the wind picked me up about 7 feet and then dropped me down, ouch. It didn’t feel any better with sneakers on a grassy field. I ended up with 2 people grabbing at my feet to keep me from flying away and then we all crashed to the ground. I guess that’s what makes it extreme.

  • Alex says:

    >”Whack?” That was the term you chose to use to describe that situation? Really?Why not just make a joke about Chris Brown producing “hits”.Your flipflops are in your mailbox.

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